Dear J, I wish that you are well and happy. You could be happier, couldn’t you? The sun should have spent a little more time over us. I am writing, short pieces, notes I took under your influence. It means that I wont sleep again, so, I will keep my eyes on the doorway and wait for you enter in the rain of flowers, half woman, half apparition, imagine you dancing alone in a garden, or be busy in the kitchen, your hair unraveled, you would be in a hurry. It would be wonderful, wonderful to see you. Dear J, please stay out of harms way. If I find lines in which I am not desperate to meet, talk with you, hold you tell you how I feel, a will send them. I am not sure that there are any. Good night dear J. Have a sweet, happy dream, search for me, find me, I need some of that happiness. With love, Karoly.
July 20 2020.
J, no matter what I do, a wonderful little discovery is waiting for me, somewhere around the corner where I live, on a page of what I read, that takes me back to the few minutes we were close to each other, to the few words we exchanged. I asked you about your name that I found unusual; reading The New Yorker, March 11, 2020, there, all the letters that are missing after your J, those that I do not spell out when I am writing to you, were waving to me, jumping up and down, they were happy to be found, not as happy as I was reading their messages that your name has a Latin origin, in our time meaning: youthful, I could not agree more, when I saw you first coming toward me I thought that I had terrible luck. The most beautiful girl will do things to me, take the blanket off from my body, you were so professional, but dearest J, how could you be so beautiful, I remember your word: “relax your muscle”, I could for a few seconds, you would never guess, if I could have looked at you while you attended to me, regardless of the pain you could have cut off my legs. Encouraged by my lucky find on page fourteen, I looked what I may give you with the origins of my name a Hungarian, Sandor, was born out of Ale-xader, the roots lead to: Help the other men. With the Karoly, I found that it had Old Turkic roots, meant= hawk. God bless his eyes, helped me to escape from a railway station from unknowable fate from those who captured me. Your name indicates will stay young for ever. Mine indicates that I will help others where is a need, and keep flying until I find you. Ciao, with love, Karoly.