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2020-06-25

Dear J, beautiful J, I know that I could have contacted the virus, I knew, hoped that I would not see you, hoped that you would not appear, yet I still went to the deli, because that was a place where I used to wait. I am not going to investigate whether you are married. I know we will meet. One embrace will make me forget the night and days of waiting. It is wonderful to think of you. Lock you out of my life I could ask: is not seeing you again so dreadful a thing? Am I typing false hopes out of my keyboard? Not at all. I met the divine, I am so happy for the gift life gave me. We will smile when we meet again. Tomorrow I will look around there to find where I could get some flowers, they were always on my side. And if you come disguised I will recognize you by the draw of the millions little magnets that fills your being. A great poet once wrote that seeing two lovers make love would worth to be killed for, stabbed in the heart, because seeing them would completely fill his famished heart, life could not give more, greater gift than witnessing their happiness, that would make him happy too. No, I love you and wait till you decide, or life’s current sweeps me close to you again. I know where you are but feel that I should not go, will not go closer unless you want me too. Please stay out of harms way, I beg you. One day I might be on my knees holding you, but now, I just pray, ask that if you have a fight on your hands let me know, I don’t think you need addition masks and shields, I have the greatest resource of all mankind: love. I will wait, but please do not come, you too should wait. It will happen. We will celebrate, swim, laugh and love.

Ciao, Karoly.

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